Stay at Home Mom: The First Month

I have been a Stay at Home Mother for a month. Thoughts, feelings? Exhausted. Happy. Terrified. I told myself that if I was going to jump into the deep end of this new transition. I did a dive. New here? Go read the New Transition. It gives you more background on me, myself, and I. My goal was to keep everyone busy including myself. So let's dive in on how well that went.

Week One/Two: I got a dumpster. You know the ones you put in your driveway and you fill into the very tip top and then they take it away for you? I looked at my home and thought, "All of this has got to go." I wish I was kidding. It was donate, trash, repeat. There was so much, "I meant to do this awhile ago," as a working mom that a lot of it just built up. That very first week I took the challenge head on. If it didn't fit, it was broken, or if someone forgot about it a month ago. It was gone.

I also established the summer garden. I moved the three garden beds, and turned my now full of weeds Butterfly garden into something beautiful. I am out there still to this week daily. I water, weed, repeat. The main picture is a cartoon version of my hard work. Our youngest LOVES going out and helping me water the plants. It is so adorable seeing her carrying our water pail to the potted plants. I keep two rain barrels in the backyard and these are how we fill up our water pail. She may have ended up soaked once or twice. She still smiled the whole time.

The first few weeks I had been home, I was stuck in the "I am going to run of time," mindset. I kept thinking that I am going to have to go back to work and my projects would be for nothing. I was so used to pushing my projects into the weekend, that my first two weeks weren't relaxing at all. I was either playing catch up or still in this anxiety cycle. I was restless to say the least.

Week Three/four: I got ambitious and created a cleaning schedule. I looked up all the schedules on Pinterest. Did you know that people clean their baseboards regularly in their house? I didn't. I would watch those Tik Tok's late at night, but I didn't know people actually did it outside of trying to get clicks. You are probably totally judging me right now. I promise you as a working mom the baseboards were the last thing on my mind. It was more, "did I get this request off correct?", and, "I hope that event doesn't get moved!" My all time favorite: "Another School event in the middle of the day? Seriously?" I created the schedule and didn't follow it at all. I kept an idea out of what to clean, but I looked at the bathroom on Monday and thought.. how about the Laundry room instead? Laundry Room deep cleans are meant for Tuesday's.

I looked for summer programs and athletics that the kids might enjoy. That is when I found swim team through our local YMCA. Our two middle children started swim and I can say I enjoy it as much as they do. It is our first year and I think we got sucked into the windstorm. We have so much more to learn, but they get out of the house every day and so far we have had one meet. It was pure chaos. Chaos that I.. enjoyed? I continue to take all the kids to the library and they jump into SummerRead and all the activities. I am thankful for these consistencies and social outings.

Here is my hypothetical schedule:

Daily: Laundry and sweeping are a must in our home. I have two dogs and three cats. The children run inside and outside. I can't not sweep. We have hard wood and vinyl flooring and I use the Shark Cordless Pet Stick Vacuum. It comes apart and it has a beautiful swivel. I have had this for four years and I love it. It is still working great. I also have what I call outside chores (feeding/watering and collecting eggs from the chickens and picking up dog poop) animal chores (Feeding/Watering, Cleaning the cat boxes), and Kitchen reset (dishes, wiping down counters, and trash). I split these amongst the kiddos every day as chore based tasks. I bought a vinyl chalk board and attached it to the refrigerator. I wrote the daily tasks in chalk and I rotate magnets every day to keep track of who has the chore. This was a blessing because the kids would argue every day about who did the chore before.

Monday: Swim practice in the morning, Bathroom deep clean, Mop, and go to the library for returning books and picking out new ones.

Tuesday: Laundry room deep clean, Storytime at the Library for the Toddlers, Makerspace at the Library for my preteens, and swim practice in the evening.

Wednesday: Weeding the Garden, Deep Clean the Kitchen, Swim Practice in the Evening.

Thursday: Swim Practice in the morning, Clean the baseboards, and Mop.

Friday: Swim Practice in the morning and just daily items. My step children usually return to their mom's on this day and the Daily chores add up.

Saturday: Daily chores and we typically do a summer Event (Zoo, Strawberry Fest, Go to Garage Sales, etc.).

Sunday: Day of Rest

The Dark Monster eventually reared it's head. Depression. I told myself I wasn't doing a good job. I didn't have a social life. I felt tired. Were the kids busy enough? Were they too busy? Were they HAPPY? My boyfriend was telling me that the kids seemed happier and that I was doing a great job! So why couldn't I feel it?

The thing is, I knew it was coming. It always comes with change. The troubling part is I always had a way of measuring progress. How do you measure progress as a SAHM? If you have any tips on that one, comment below. I am all ears. I started thinking about the little goals I had for my family. The kids getting reading in and working on their comprehension. Yes, even through the summer. The kids going to swim and working on their form. Our youngest making her, "1000 Books before Kindergarten" goal. Prepping our oldest for Cross Country. I focused on these and got out of my funk.

I am still learning as I go everyday. Realizing what is working and what isn't, both for me and my kids. I keep a better mindset when I am constantly busy. When I was younger my mom always told me I had to slow down or tell me no to going somewhere. It wasn't until I was older that I told her I actually really enjoy being busy and it keeps me happy. Cue my mother looking at me like I was an alien.